Women are given looks of disapproval and  disgust from men and even other women sometimes when they see you living worry-free with your stretch marks. I was listening to Kendrick Lamar’s Humble. There’s a part in that song that says “show me something natural like ass with some stretch marks”. I was like yeeeeees Dzadzy😂!!!

In 2017, shockingly, there are still people who frown apon having stretch marks like you took time out of your life, sat down and stretched your own skin. They’ll make you feel unattractive and a sort of freak because of them. Little do they know that every contour line on that body is symbolic of your physical growth.

Honestly, I feel like men and some women should stop being childish. Stretch marks are very natural. Its not self inflicted so who are you to bring a woman down and make her feel less worthy because of her stretch marks?! Your staring and rude remarks reflect your level of immaturity. It speaks volumes about the kind of person you are. The question is- would you look at your mother with disgust if you saw the stretch marks she endured from carrying you? I think NOT! Take some time and process that!

I find this attitude especially disgusting when women who have given birth are ridiculed by the baby’s father. I can only imagine the feeling of a life growing inside of you and your body stretching to accommodate that baby. Oh my word, the power that females have is amazing😍. Then some idiot will feel the need to bring you down as though you made the baby by yourself. WOW! The funny thing in the case of women will be that they’ll look at a person with stretch marks and be disgusted but the person’s face ALONE beats the hater’s body and entire existence. Shame.

Some stretch marks are brought on by weight gain – in my case. I used to have baby skin clear of imperfections till i started growing up. Even then, I did not ask God to give me stretch marks so being teased about it is really stupid.

I live WITH my stretch marks because I’ve accepted that they’re not going anywhere. After so much money wasted on products trying to remove them, they just became lighter. Me having stretch marks does not affect my IQ in any way, nor does it make me less attractive or less worthy of love, respect, dignity and kindness. If anything, it has made me confident and I walk proudly. I dont try to hide them because they are a part of who I am. I am beautiful WITH my stretch marks honey!

Men and women who still hate on stretch marks need to be fed a steady diet of purity, nestum and breast milk cause they have a lot of growing up to do.

Go forth and be fabulous, you sexy tiger!!!😍
Oh and a special shout out to the men who love their women and their stretch marks. We are your sexy zebras baby!!


Bafazini Syndrome* 

The term “Bafazini” is used to describe a man who feels the need to dabble or weighin on women issues. Gossipping, hair, nails, complexion…the works.

There’s a difference between being interested and this thing men do. Men will get to a point where they’re arguing with you about something you know better about. How is that possible? I dont understand whether its a lowkey way of coming out of the closet, metrosexuality creeping in or something else.

Couple of weeks back, I was talking about vaginal elasticity. This guy said I must go read up about it since I’m misinformed. 😂😂 Can we just correct all the flaws in that. Last I checked, which was about 2minutes ago- I had a vagina right inbetween my legs. So compared to somone who isn’t an anatomy specialist or an OBGYN and actually has a penis, I KNOW better. Plus, I consider myself to be an intelligent being. He got to a point where he said my man should teach me a lesson because I’m stupid. 😕 Stupid for not listening to a mysogenist man with a penis trying to tell me about vaginal elasticity…wow.

Just the other day a group of ignorant boys (early 20’s are boys to me) were saying that girls with manicures dont wipe their asses properly. 😕. So to break it down according to them- every woman out there with a manicure is walking around with a dirty butthole. I think people expose themselves in that they hang around with people who walk around with sh*t stains in their butts. UPGRADE YOUR GIRLS! Men need to understand that a manicure is not a handicap or a disability. The things we do when we have normal nails are the same things we do when we have a manicure. Only difference is we’re more careful when we have a manicure. Now more than ever its clear that if men had manicures, they wouldnt wipe their buttholes properly. Thinking we use the whole toilet paper roll…how? This is the reason men can’t have manicures. They don’t have the mental capacity to fathom that life still goes on normally with a manicure.

Men will become so concerned about your weave/wig and tracks like they’re the 1 to go through it all. Its not your hair it’ll be attached to, you’re not the 1 who has to manage it and if you didn’t pay for it then its none of your business. Why are you trying to complicate your life when all you need is a R10 chiskop?

So what if females use products to lighten their skin? Are you going to be the 1 to use the products? No. All you do is watch the skin shades get lighter. Your job is to watch only. Nothing more.

There’s nothing wrong with being interested. Ask questions, its ok! I remember my boyfriend’s face when I took off my wig infront of him😂😂. It was like his brain was malfunctioning😂😂. It was a priceless moment. He then asked me why it looks like its attached to my hair. I explained and he understood. He didnt argue with me about money I spent on it, why I have it and why it’s not attached to my hair because its not his business. He doesnt have to worry about that.

I’d like to end off simply by saying.


Go See A Gynaecologist📣

Ive noticed there’s this fear when it comes to pap smears and going to the gynea. As though you’re gonna feel the pain. Like they’re gonna take a whole chunk of your cervix. When in actual fact the only thing you feel is the small pain from speculum used to open you up a bit.

Anyway Im not an OBGYN. Im not qualified in the medical field but I am a female who has been through 2 gynaechologically related surgeries within the 60 something days of this year. That was not a rosey journey for me, so I feel like I should share what was wrong with me to begin with. Maybe someone out there could be saved by reading this because gynaechological problems are sometimes fatal.

I started having menstrual problems in my matric year, 2010.(Yes I’m old!). I’d have my forever period. Thats what I used to call them…cause they went on for forever! Literally 2 months of bleeding. People would say I’m getting lighter when in actual fact I was becoming pale from so much blood loss. I remember being in Mr Kumar’s English class, 1st period and I remember feeling blood dripping down between my legs down to stain my white socks. See it wasnt 1 of those 3-4 pads a day type of period. It was the whole pack of pads a day kind. 

I started using contraceptives which normalised my flow for a bit till the tap would be opened again. So for years on end, I hopped from 1 contraceptive to another, from Dr to Dr, specialists, clinics….the works! But nothing. I even got to a point where after I was hospitalized from fainting due to severe blood loss- prescribed MENOPAUSE MEDICATION!! Yes! At 24, my mother and I were on the same medication but my dose was stronger. I wont lie, the medication helped abit…until 1 Dr told me that just a few days prior to my appointment, he had seen a woman who had cancer because of the chronic use of this medication. Because my mom and my cousin suffered from the same problem in their youth, I decided to just let it go. Maybe it would go away by itself as I grew. But no….

So I rang into 2017 with backpain and cramps. I just thought it was the effects of the busride from Mthatha to Joburg then a taxi to Mafikeng. Little did I know what was happening inside of me. My period started on the 4th of January 2017. When it didnt stop after a week, I decided to take contraceptives again thinking my forever period is back. 2days later, the flow was getting worse, the cramps, when I urinated I felt like screaming from the immense pain. Being a soldier’s girl, I decided to be strong and ride it out. The night of the 30th of January I could not sleep because of the pain I was in. So at 4am I took a bath and at 5am I headed out to the nearby Gynaecological Hospital. 

That day, my life would change. I spoke to an OBGYN about all my symptoms and basically laid out my life story. Ultrasound found I had fibroids and endometriosis. Pap smear results a week later found that I had cancer indicators. Imagine hearing those kind of news and you’re so far away from home. I felt myself becoming cold. I cried soooo much. I remember the emptiness I felt when I had to let my mother and  partner know that I needed surgery to remove the parts of my cervix that showed I could develop cancer.

Anyway, fast foward to 4weeks- post both my surgeries- I have no indicators of cancer, no more fibroids and all the endometrioma have been burned off. Currently recovering from all that.

So here’s what I’ve learned:

•GO FOR A PAP SMEAR EVERY YEAR!! Some people wont feel anything and never develop symptoms but you never know whats going on inside of you.

•Don’t ignore your symptoms or any pain. It wont just go away by itself.

•Be honest with your Gynaecologist. That person doesnt know whats going on so its up to you to give the full story.

•Ask questions! Dont sit there and be a sponge. Its your body. You have to know whats going on with you.

I hope my story will make you see the importance of pap smears and gynaecologic visits. If I had not gone that day, maybe in a year or so I would have cervical cancer.